Clutter and Organization

Hi, my name is Erica and I am a perfectionist.  I have this crazy idea that the tasks on my extremely long to-do list have to be completed perfectly. 

My lovely and talented mother is a perfectionist so I come by it naturally.  Growing up, I watched as she seemed to breeze through anything and everything she had to do, and when she was done it was fantastic.  It looked amazing.  It was as if she was gliding on air in chores and activities.  She was and still is a very organized person.  In some ways, I am very much like my mother.  I love to organize.  When I was in high school and college my place was organized and clean.  I was able to complete things in a timely manner and with the simplest of ease.  

Recently I discovered that my perfectionist characteristics are holding me back.  Remember my post a couple of weeks ago about organizing?  I set my goal to one room a month.  Simple task right?  But what I am finding that I set my goals so obnoxiously high that I become discouraged when I am unable to obtain that goal.  I insist on dotting all the i's and crossing all the t's that I forget what is really important.  I know the first step is the realization.  Yes, I see this but I have been unable to change it. *sigh* This last week I have found myself reading numerous blogs that are riddled with ideas and suggestions, checklists, and guides and although they are all great ideas, it is just feeding this disability and my procrastination.

I think what really drew my attention to this was seeing my daughter and the problems she is having with the school.  Her 'I have to do it perfectly' attitude.  It really makes life difficult.  Wait I hear a commercial coming "Do you get frustrated when you cannot do something?  Discouraged that it didn't work out the first time?  Or maybe you find yourself procrastinating about a job?  This could be a sign of perfectionism. If you or a loved one suffer from perfectionism call this number right now to get help!"  If only it was that easy, right? 

For me the problem is my home.  I have always had a vision of my home is

a simple, picturesque place, that is neat and clean with a place for everything and everything in its place.  Then I think -- you have a husband AND a child, what you are dreaming will not never happen.

Thanks to HGTV (which I can no longer watch), my perfectionism has been fed by images of perfectly decorated and organized homes.  My question to those who get their room makeovers, where do they put all of your crap?  How do you let go of things that you once held so dearly?  Do you have the same problem I do in the fact that you think 'I might need this...'?  These decorating gurus give fantastic advice but how does the average person follow through?

I keep telling myself that by taking care of one pile of clutter I will not make my house perfect, but it will make a difference.  I have rejoined the Mama's Mission of the Month group which is helping my list of goals.  I now have broken my goal into smaller bit-size pieces.

Originally, my bedroom was my first project, and even the smallest little bit will help.  *deep sigh*  Now I have to take the time to do it and follow through.  Do or do not there is no try.  A good friend of mine told me that she didn't care what my house looked like she just wanted to visit.  I cringed at the thought of letting anyone in my home.  I was nervous and scared but I had to remember to stay focused.  Staying focused is easier said than done.  At that time, I just moved everything that didn't have a place in my living room to my bedroom.  Just some advice never, never, never do that because it never leaves!

Sure, I want to be in control of the clutter and dirt.  I need to learn to keep my feelings of anxiousness at bay.  I want my daughter to grow up in a home that is basically organized and tidy.  This is a house in which people live so it cannot be perfect (at least to my ultimate satisfaction) but it can look attractive.

I have to admit that it's okay if we stack movies on the end of the hutch, or books on the coffee table.  It's okay if we have toys on the floor during the day.  It's okay if my daughter tracks dirt in from outside, but dang it, I want to be Mary flipping Poppins!  I want to be able to snap my fingers and everything puts itself away.   

Giving up on perfectionism can be done, I am just not sure if it can be done by me.  Can I be satisfied if it is made better yet not perfect?  A fantastic friend once told me, "We may not be pleased with the way our homes look, your home looks wonderful to me.  Just remember we have children (and husbands!).  We can keep our houses mostly clean, most of the time, but it will never be perfect.  That's okay.  NOW GET OVER IT!"  I hate it when she is right! *stomp, stomp, stomp*

Now back to work.  I have a task that needs tending to and blogging about it procrastinating about it is not going to get it done.